First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #13: A Challenge You’ve Overcome.

Wow, where to start?

Some of you know that I was born at 25 weeks, so I had to fight for my life at the very start!

But, thinking about this post over the past week, one of the biggest challenges for me was deciding to leave my friends and school district to pursue something completely different.

When I was in eighth grade, a new magnet program had just started in one of Chesapeake’s high schools called International Baccalaureate (IB). It wasn’t new to the Hampton Roads area at the time, but it was fresh and brand-new for the City of Chesapeake and Chesapeake Public Schools.

Several of the freshmen came to my middle school to give us an overview of the program and how we could apply. After much consideration and discussion with my parents (and a good bit of prayer), I decided to apply.

I still remember how nervous I was. I even left my purse and house keys at Oscar Smith on the day of my interview and test! (Luckily, I got them back with nothing missing!)

After what seemed like waiting forever, the guidance counselor pulled me out of orchestra to tell me I had been accepted. At that moment, I felt pure joy. I was excited for something new!

However, once I started telling my friends, my joy and excitement started to erode. I was leaving them behind at Western Branch, according to them.

Going in, I knew this program was going to be challenging. I knew I was going to be taking college-level courses throughout my four years of high school. The summer assignments were enough to make me croak! I started questioning my decision, but I knew I needed to try it first.

I was the only student from the Western Branch district that first year; I was alone. Several people at church teased me incessantly – They said I was a “traitor” for leaving, especially since Oscar Smith’s football team consistently beat the snot out of Western Branch’s!

For the first six months of freshman year, I cried almost every day. I wanted to go back to Western Branch; I wanted to be with my friends again. My grades tanked! It was a struggle. Math sucked even more. Spanish was a nightmare! Even orchestra was harder!

Making friends at Oscar Smith was hard, but keeping friends at church and Western Branch was harder. I wanted to try out for the school softball team, but ended up not because I realized I couldn’t juggle IB, orchestra, and softball. It wasn’t possible.

Fortunately, once I adjusted (along with the other 49 kids in my class), it started to get better. After Christmas, my grades started to improve. My brain just needed time to adjust to the increased workload, managing the higher-level concepts, and being in a completely different environment. It got easier during sophomore year. It got harder in junior year, when we transitioned to full IB, with our assessments, Extended Essay, and preparing for our exams. We were all nervous wrecks for half of senior year as we prepared and took our exams, but we were done by the end of May. We were able to relax and enjoy the last few weeks before graduation.

The teachers were amazing, in my opinion. They were experts in their fields, but they were also willing to bend over backwards to help anyone with anything. The IB coordinators, Mrs. Ingersoll, and later Mrs. Lancaster (who’s still the coordinator today), were counselors, shoulders to cry on, and a support system. I think of Mrs. Lancaster (Biology, now the IB Coordinator), Mrs. Cofield (European and U.S. History), Mr. Degnan (English – Now one of the high school’s assistant principals), Mrs. Zwemer (Geometry, Math Studies – May she rest in peace), and Mr. Allen (20th Century History) often, to name a few.

This year marks 10 years since high school graduation. Although I clearly remember the struggles, the griping, the crying, the frustration (I still don’t fully understand the Federalist Papers, hardly anything with Algebra II, or why the Visual Arts teacher was so harsh with certain levels of interpretation), I also remember that I accomplished something – I earned my IB Diploma. I earned college credit. I went into Longwood with a much better understanding of most freshman college courses (with the exception of math – I still got a C in Honors Statistics!).

Because of IB, I was able to go on a 17-day trip to Europe (England, France, and Spain) in the summer of 2005. What an experience! Because of that trip. I decided to take a class at Longwood that took me back to France for a week in 2008, being able to further appreciate the museums of Paris and everything that the City of Lights offers.

I learned so much in four years. All because I took a chance on a new program, and I decided to stick with it, even when I thought I was going to fail everything.

Now, I’m proud to say that a current IB freshman is from my church. Many students from Western Branch have gone through the IB program in the last 10 years – Liz, Jeremy, Alyssa, Steven, Lindsey, and more.

IB was a great challenge for me, but one of the most rewarding in my entire life. I hope it’s still around when my future children are ready to go to high school!

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

After much internal deliberation and debate, I think I’m most grateful for my compassion. I was raised that way, and I’m also grateful that it’s stuck with me all these years.

There have been several times where I was at a crossroads, and having compassion was one of the choices I could make. Although difficult sometimes, usually I’ve chosen to take the high road, and show compassion to others.

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Compassion, however, does come with a bit of a price. I was a literal doormat for years, especially when I was younger. I was so naive. I would give so much of myself, only to have a few select people walk all over me, and straight up take advantage of me.

Example: I tried to be friendly and sweet with some of the popular girls (cheerleaders, etc.) in middle school – Boy, did that backfire.

It happened with my ex-boyfriend, John – I was so compassionate towards him, that I ended up in an abusive relationship with him for the better part of four years.

It happened more recently with another former friend, J. – He saw my compassion immediately, and that turned into an ugly infatuation situation (meaning him being infatuated/obsessed/in love with me/wanting to kiss me, etc.) that I couldn’t break free of for a good long while. He blocked me on Facebook almost a year ago. It hurt a little at first, but to be completely honest, I’m far happier this way.

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I still give a lot of myself now, but I’m much more knowledgeable about people being mean-spirited and using others for their own gain.

I’ve scaled back a few friendships because of this. It was tough making that type of decision, but I’m grateful that I stuck to my guns. I’ve found that I’m far happier when I’m aiming my compassion at the people, places, and things that I truly care about!

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I leave you this Wednesday with a quote from Nelson Mandela:

“Our human compassion binds us the one to the other – not in pity or patronizingly – but as human beings who have learnt how to turn our common suffering into hope for the future.”

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #11: Someone Who Inspires You.

There are so many people that inspire me – It’s really hard to pick just one person!

When reviewing the prompt this past weekend, I thought of my mom’s mother – My Grandma Grace. Some of you have seen me mention her on the blog before. She was an amazing woman!

She lived to be 96. This year will have been her 100th birthday!

Born in 1917, in West Virginia, she lived through the Great Depression. She went to college in Ohio, which was still relatively unusual for women back then. She married my grandpa just five days before D-Day in 1944, at an Army base in Texas. Grandpa proudly served in the Army and fought in World War II.

After he got out of the Army, they moved to Florida. She worked as a social worker, and was a dutiful housewife. My grandpa was a successful businessman in Miami for many years, owning/managing furniture stores and other businesses. My Uncle Richard was born first, and then my mom came along two years later.

I was very lucky to have her in my life until I was nearly 25! She was a wonderful caregiver for Grandpa, who passed away in August 2008. I loved traveling to Coral Gables to see them several times a year – Over the years, I gained a great appreciation for Coral Gables, Coconut Grove, Miami, and the surrounding areas.

She was incredibly wise, and super smart. She loved doing the crossword puzzle in The Miami Herald every day, and she nearly finished it before the day’s end, every time. She taught me how to play to Scrabble. She also taught me that Oreos simply taste better when they’ve been frozen!

Grandma Grace inspired me to do, and taught me, many things:

• Take good care for my possessions
• Travel the world
• Learn how to cook good food
• Visit the library early and often
• Going to church is important, and also a wonderful source of socialization
• Read, read, and keep reading
• Always send thank-you notes
• Find a craft that you love (Hers was with her church group, making place mats out of greeting cards!)
• Call your family and friends frequently
• Keep up with current and world events
• Enjoy your family for as long as possible

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂