Tag Archives: Accountability

01.21.16
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Commentary #14: “2016 Reading Challenge”


Challenge accepted!

I found this on Facebook a couple days ago. I’m really motivated to do this!

Here’s what I’m thinking for accomplishing this list:

A book published this year: This Is Where It Ends, Marieke Nijkamp

A book you can finish in a day: The Language of Silence, Tiffany Truitt

A book you’ve been meaning to read: Go Set A Watchman, Harper Lee

A book recommended by your local librarian or bookseller: Black Rabbit Hall, Eve Chase

A book you should have read in school: Gone With The Wind, Margaret Mitchell

A book chosen for you by your spouse, partner, sibling, child, or BFF: The Red Tent, Anita Diamant (Recommended by my BFF Melissa)

A book published before you were born: The Man in the High Castle, Philip K. Dick

A book that was banned at some point: Tropic of Cancer, Henry Miller

A book you previously abandoned: The Vacationers, Emma Straub

A book you own but have never read: New Boy, Julian Houston

A book that intimidates you: The Casual Vacancy, J.K. Rowling

A book you’ve already read at least once: The Hunger Games trilogy, Suzanne Collins

Be prepared for many Book Review posts this year!

I’m probably a little too excited to be making time to read again, but, to paraphrase one of these books, I don’t give a damn. Reading is a true escape for me.

Are you doing a challenge like this?

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

09.25.15
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Hot Topic #11: Big Pharma – A Look Into Martin Shkreli, The Gobs Of Money, And More

Disclaimer: This post contains strong language.

Earlier this week, the Internet basically blew up because of this guy:

Image Credit: NBC News via Paul Taggart / Bloomberg via Getty Images file

Image Credit: NBC News via Paul Taggart / Bloomberg via Getty Images file

The media was all over it. Outrage was almost instantaneous. Martin Shkreli has been called almost every name in the book: “Public Enemy No. 1,” “the most hated man in America,” “a spoiled brat” by none other than Donald Trump, and more. The Daily Beast blatantly called him an asshole in their main headline, which was my exact impression of this shitty scumbag and fucking bottom feeder when the news first broke.

Shkreli’s decision to raise the price of Daraprim, used to treat an infection caused by a parasite, from a sensible $13.50 per pill to over $750 per dose, was jaw-dropping, among other things.

He soon back-pedaled, but the damage was already done:

It’s bad enough when your one decision sparks worldwide outrage, but I think it’s worse when your supposed colleagues in your own industry and supporting industries turn their backs on you. However, this piece of shitty scum totally deserves it. I’m applauding those in the bio tech industry and PhRMA for standing up and saying, “Whoa, hang on a second, this is not acceptable.” Read more from The Washington Post.

With that said, however, my applause is limited and short-lived. These industries are fucking money hoarders!

In The Daily Beast article, a reporter confronted Shkreli about the low cost of producing Daraprim – Roughly one dollar per pill.

Shkreli’s response to her?

” … Shkreli claimed that the price hike was necessary for Turing Pharmaceuticals to increase revenue, and that some of the profits would be funneled into research and development costs for a Daraprim alternative …”

That?

That’s PURE FUCKING GREED.

However, as The Washington Post article said, Shkreli is certainly not the first drug company executive, or drug company, to drastically raise prices.

Shkreli’s been in the news before – When he was the CEO of Retrophin, the company acquired Thiola, a drug used to treat an incurable kidney disease, with plans to raise its price over 20 times. The Retrophin board fired Shkreli and sued him for $65 million, accusing him of misusing company funds.

Here’s a few examples of those costs:

And, as I learned from researching for this post, the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) apparently can’t do a damn thing about drug prices. They have no “legal authority to investigate or control the prices charged for marketed drugs,” according to a response on the FDA’s frequently asked questions section of their website.

Reading that statement basically knocked me over, initially.

According to an article from The Atlantic, Americans were reminded this week that the U.S. is the only fucking country in the FUCKING WORLD “where drug companies set their own prices for life-saving medications.”

Cue eye roll, heavy sigh, and head-shaking.

But, wait, hold on to your hats folks, there’s actually SOME GOOD NEWS!

Before this, and now even more so because of the spotlight on and scrutiny of Shkreli, people are actually paying attention, and giving a fuck!

All right, so maybe that first set of sentences were slightly sarcastic …

For me, I’ll believe all of this when I see it.

Meaning, I’ll believe it when Congress takes action.

Right now, the only thing that all of this proves to me is Big Pharma is king, and no one can reach his throne to take away his crown.

As someone who has typically chosen Democrat in the nine years that I have been able to vote, I’m genuinely intrigued at how Hillary and Bernie Sanders have responded to this debacle. However, I’m not entirely convinced. We are preparing for an election, after all.

There’s also the topic of generic drugs versus the brand names. I have personally struggled with this battle. I am fortunate to have a great work-sponsored health insurance plan and pharmacy coverage. However, my pharmacy coverage is extremely limited – It covers mainly generic drugs and prescriptions; almost nothing brand-name is listed in their database.

I struggle with this because the best birth control formula that I have found that works for me and my body does not have a generic form, at least not yet. At one point, I was paying nearly $100 per month for this particular formula. It finally got to the point where I couldn’t afford it, and I was forced to switch to a generic to save that money. Although switching to the generic reduced the cost from $100 to FREE because of my coverage, it was a sacrifice because it was a different formula, and my body reacted adversely, along with my emotional state every month. After struggling for a year or so, I asked my doctor for help. I’m so grateful for her – We have a plan in place for now and for the near future as I prepare for marriage and starting a family eventually, until the makers of the best formula release a generic version of their product, and hopefully that future generic version is covered under my insurance.

My predicament is most certainly small potatoes to those who deal with chronic and life-threatening conditions on a daily basis – Diabetes, cancer, mental illness, and more – and I definitely don’t want to minimize those struggles in any way. However, I wanted to share that small story of mine to help illustrate a point – I have dealt with Big Pharma and their drugs and their exorbitant costs, and almost everyone I know have dealt with it all, some much more often than others.

I could go on and on and on, but I think this is enough, for now.

I’ll leave you with John Oliver’s take on this – A double dose (no pun intended).

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

08.15.15
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Hot Topic #10: One Woman’s Horrifying Ordeal – This Is Definitely Not Okay

Image Credit: framingham.digication.com

Image Credit: framingham.digication.com

Disclaimer: This post contains strong language and graphic descriptions of human anatomy.

My friend Justin told me about this story earlier this week. He couldn’t believe it, and neither could I. It makes me sick, but I want to bring awareness to this. I’m certain that this isn’t the first time something like this has happened.

Buckle up your fucking seat belts, people. This is one bat-shit crazy story.

Here’s the scenario:

You’re a young woman, driving to the store one night to get medicine for your sick mother. You get pulled over by a local sheriff’s deputy, for allegedly running a stop sign. The male officer says he smells marijuana. You’re handcuffed, placed in the officer’s patrol car, and the officer searches your car.

Then, the situation escalates to where a female officer is called to the scene, called in to perform a body cavity search.

That means the female officer was called to search your vagina for the suspected weed.

Yes, you read that correctly.

Would you believe me if I told you that scenario actually happened?

In the end, after being handcuffed and forced to drop your pants IN PUBLIC for said digital search of your vagina, the officers found just 0.02 ounces of marijuana.

Don’t believe me?

The woman’s name is Charnesia Corley. She’s 21-years-old.

Let’s clarify one thing first: There have been conflicting reports / quotes regarding the type of search that Corley endured. Some have said strip search. Many have said body cavity search.

A body cavity search is either a visual search or a manual internal inspection of body cavities such as for prohibited material (contraband), such as illegal drugs, money, jewelry, or weapons.

Body cavities include the nostrils, ears, mouth, navel, penis or vagina, and rectum.

This is far more invasive than the standard strip search, which “is typically performed on individuals taken into custody, either upon police arrest or incarceration at a jail, prison, or psychiatric hospital.”

Back to Corley now. This woman has been speaking her mind since the incident on June 21st, and rightfully so.

The deputies claim she resisted when the female officer told Corley to pull her pants down. Corley responded to the female deputy that she did not have any underwear on. The deputy replied that didn’t matter, pulled Corley’s pants down for her, and told her to bend over. As the deputy stuck her fingers in Corley’s vagina, Corley attempted to stand upright, claiming that the deputy could not do this. The deputy’s response to that, according to Corley, was that “she [the deputy] could do what she wanted because it was a narcotics search.”

At the end of all of this insanity, Corley was charged with resisting arrest and possession of marijuana.

Hold the phone, stop right there.

First of all, this search was conducted in a gas station parking lot, around 10:30 p.m. on the night of June 21st. I understand the searching of the car; that’s normal, standard procedure. Law enforcement is allowed to conduct this, so long as the driver of the vehicle gives consent to do so.

Calling for backup is also standard procedure. Calling for a female deputy is also standard, when a search of a female suspect is needed.

HOWEVER – Conducting a body cavity search, in public, for anyone to see?! That’s breaking the fucking law. How ironic.

Many of the links I’ve provided have quotes from Corley’s attorney and others:

“… Unconstitutional …”

“… Blatant violation of the Fourth Amendment …”

“… A clear violation of common protocol for the Harris County Sheriff’s Office …”

The search was conducted “without a warrant …”

You’re damn right.

The Fourth Amendment to the United States Constitution states:

The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects,[a] against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.[2]

Corley was a victim of unreasonable search and seizure, plain and simple!

Here was one kicker for me:

“To perform a cavity search, deputies should arrest a suspect and take them to an HSCO substation,” the Houston Chronicle noted. “Headquarters downtown even boasts a microwave scanner that can perform the task without intrusion.”

WHAT THE HELL?

This poor woman. Yes, she was arrested. However, she wasn’t transported to a substation. She was clearly, in my mind, assaulted by these deputies.

To me, none of these three deputies for the Harris County Sheriff’s Office gave a fucking shit about this woman. They blatantly ignored her constitutional rights and publicly humiliated her! They should have stopped the search IMMEDIATELY when Corley protested, saying, “Ma’am, you cannot do this.”

Corley is 21. I can tell, from afar, that she has been traumatized by this horrific ordeal.

However, I’m glad she’s said something. She’s been interviewed multiple times by numerous sources. CNN picked it up on Thursday, so it’s gone international now.

And you know what? That’s a good thing. This should be international news.

Multiple lawsuits have been filed. The ACLU is involved.

I hope, for the love of God, that these deputies get fired. I hope that policies and procedures are reviewed, scrutinized, and CHANGED. They need to be reinforced – Drilled into every deputy’s head.

No wonder citizens are having trouble trusting those in law enforcement.

I hope this story doesn’t fade away. I truly hope Corley gets the justice she deserves.

I hope, once all the legal matters are sorted out, that the media covers it again. I hope it goes international again, honestly.

She’s made her voice heard, and now it’s time for her to be supported. It’s beyond time for change.

What do you think? I’d love to hear your comments.

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

08.06.15
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Hot Topic #9: The Medicaid Gap

“People in Medicaid ought to have access to the same insurance as the rest of the population. If they are segregated, it will be a poor plan for poor people.” ~John Goodman

This post was inspired by a post on the National Public Radio (NPR) Facebook page.

The story was titled, In Florida, A Former Fast-Food Worker Lands In Medicaid Gap.

Cynthia Lewis is caught between a rock and a hard place. Reading her story made me sick. She dropped her Burger King-sponsored insurance because of the cost, but then she got sick. Needing insurance, she thought she could get Obamacare subsidies.

Nope.

Then, she thought she could get Medicaid in Florida.

Not so – She makes too much money.

Also, Florida is one of the states that has not expanded Medicaid.

“… The popular description of Medicaid is that it’s health insurance for the poor.

But in fact it’s more complicated.

To qualify you usually have to also have meet another condition: be pregnant, have a dependent child or a disability. And within each of those groups, there’s even more restrictions.

For example, in a family of four, the most the parents can make to qualify for Medicaid in Florida is just under $8,500. A single parent who makes $6,000 a year and has one kid earns too much to qualify for Medicaid. And if someone is single with no dependent kids and isn’t disabled, no matter how little he or she makes, he or she can’t get Medicaid in the state …”

What the hell?

Depending on where you live, Florida contains some of the priciest real estate. These numbers that were quoted are staggering, and sickening. There are so many that live below the poverty line. And those that are the most vulnerable, especially the children, can’t qualify for insurance coverage from the United States government?

If you divide a $8,500 annual salary by 12, before taxes, that worker only makes $708.33 per month. In probably 99 percent of this great country of ours, a monthly salary like that won’t cover rent. And then after paying the rent/mortgage you still have the bills/utilities, get food, gas for your vehicle or public transportation to get to work, things for your kid(s), medicine, and more.

Cynthia’s story inspired me to do some research.

Medicaid was created fifty years ago this year, in 1965. President Johnson helped enact Medicaid for the poor (and Medicare for the elderly), becoming Title 19 of the Social Security Act. Since then, it’s had a lengthy and complicated history.

Although Medicaid was originally designed as a federal partnership, Florida is one of 21 states that has not expanded Medicaid, after the Supreme Court gave states that option.

I live in Virginia. Virginia is also one of those 21 states that has not expanded Medicaid coverage to low-income adults.

As of May 2015, nearly 960,000 people in Virginia were enrolled in Medicaid and The Children’s Health Insurance Program (CHIP). In comparison, throughout the nation, a total of 71.6 million are currently enrolled in Medicaid and CHIP. Since the July-September 2013 reporting period, over 12.8 million people enrolled in Medicaid and CHIP.

To be eligible for Medicaid and CHIP, it is based on an application and review of modified adjusted gross income (MAGI) levels.

Health insurance is so important, for everyone that you know. It makes me livid that there are so many that are stuck in this Medicaid gap. Most of these people are like Cynthia – They’re caught in the middle between expensive work-sponsored insurance plans and not qualifying for Obamacare subsidies and Medicaid.

I understand the reasoning behind the Supreme Court passing this power to expand Medicaid to the individual states, but, at the same time, that doesn’t solve the problem. Listening to the news reports when Virginia was wavering back and forth between expanding and not, I tried to see all viewpoints. It’s tough though, hearing the governor of your state quote that this expansion will cost the Commonwealth millions of dollars, when there are countless people in the Commonwealth that would greatly benefit from getting Medicaid coverage. It’s a terrible power struggle, and it comes down to one of the biggest and oldest motives – Money.

For more information, check out these links:

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

07.24.15
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Hot Topic #8: Slaves to Technology

Image Credit: bizgovsoc6.wordpress.com

Image Credit: bizgovsoc6.wordpress.com

“Pretty much 100% of people are texting while driving and they’re killing everyone with their cars. People are willing to risk taking a life and ruining their own because they don’t want to be alone for 5 seconds.”

~Louis C.K.

Technology is an integral part of our lives. At times, it seems like we’re constantly surrounded by it – and it’s hard to get away from it.

I’m completely guilty of this. But I’m trying to be better.

Case in point: I realized, after the fact, of course, of how rude it was to have my laptop while we had company over during the 4th of July weekend. I was listening to the conversation, but I felt terrible afterwards. I also noticed that I wasn’t the only one. The phones were put away, for the most part.

What boggles my mind, is people who don’t communicate by way of conversation anymore.

A few examples:

  • Al and I had lunch at a Mexican restaurant back in June. While we were there, having a wonderful face-to-face conversation, five guys came in and sat a booth across from us. The only time any one of them looked up from their phones was when a server came to address them. They all sat there, staring at their phones, the entire time. I couldn’t stop staring.
  • Our friends Justin and Drew were at a restaurant in Richmond a while back. Two guys sat at the table next to them, diagonal from each other. As soon as their waiter left, these guys pulled out their phones, not making any spoken conversation, no eye contact, nothing. When they were leaving, Justin turned to Drew and said, “Do you know what I saw in there? Slaves to Technology.”

I’ve heard other stories – Some more horrifying than people sitting in a restaurant, not making conversation. I’m talking about texting while driving, and other distractions.

When I Googled “slaves to technology” – This is what I found:

Granted, both of these articles were published in 2013. However, in those two short years, people all around you, day after day, have proved that this is still true!

I couldn’t find the link, but I remember reading an article a week or two ago, a first-hand account of a mom and her husband. The mom, who is a blogger, discovered that her iPad was having a problem one night. Instead of picking up the phone and dialing Apple’s customer support, she and her husband found themselves scrambling, looking for the closest Genius Bar in the closest Apple store to their house. They used all their tech in the house, desperate for a quick solution. Finally, if I remember correctly, after hours of panic, the iPad problem was actually fixable in less than five minutes, with a simple command.

She reflected on that night with horror and disdain – She and her husband were so focused on clamoring for a solution to fix their tech problem, that they forgot about the simple things. They could have left the iPad alone for the night and decided to wait until the next morning to fix it. But, she said that this insistence on fixing this instrument RIGHT THEN was further proof of their addiction to technology.

I found the Louis C.K. quote in one of the articles I mentioned earlier. It’s so true. We are afraid of being alone.

Granted, I am guilty of having sent texts in the car before. But now, I have my phones either in my purse in my backseat, or in my passenger seat where they’re out of my reach. I don’t text anymore, unless I’m at a complete stop at a stoplight, and that’s only when I respond to someone else’s text. I try really hard not to pick it up AT ALL while driving. The only people I will normally answer a call from in the car is Al, either one of my parents, or if my bosses are calling. My dad takes it a step further, he always asks me if I’m eating, drinking something, or driving. If I answer “yes” to any of those three, he’ll always say to call back when I’m safe.

I actually like the solitude of being alone in my car. Sure, traffic can be terrible on my drives to and from work, but that’s what the radio and CDs are for. I’ve learned so much from listening to NPR more frequently, for example. I’ve relished in hearing brand-new songs on the radio stations more than once. I’m also one of those people that drum on the steering wheel and bob my head when I hear a favorite song, while belting it out at the top of my lungs. Knowing that Al and I are getting married in less than four months (!!) and we do plan on having children down the road (no pun intended), I know that my days of solitude in my Camry are numbered.

For me, I try not to be bound to technology. Part of it is because I work on a computer for my job – It is a constant in my career. Sure, I enjoy having an iPhone. Sure, I enjoy having a laptop. I have a Nook tablet as well.

There are days where I leave work and go to Al’s, and I just do not want to stare at another fucking screen. We normally eat dinner in front of the TV, and there are times where I just look at my food or want to talk to Al, more than looking at another damn screen.

I do have diagnosed eye strain – It’s why I can’t wear my contact lenses to work anymore, I have to use my glasses. And when I do wear my contact lenses, I have to be very careful with my screen time. My eyes do actually go into overload mode when I look at too many screens, and subsequently, my brain gets overloaded too.

But, beyond the eye strain, I think my brain craves non-tech things, like writing and reading. I love that Al gave me the tablet for my birthday several years ago, but I can’t read books on it. I use it for games and fashion magazines mostly, plus having a really convenient, lightweight way to access Wi-Fi, rather than lugging my laptop around. However, books will always be ink and paper for me, always. And as much as I like typing and writing on the computer, I enjoy writing in cursive, and do that every chance I can get.

I love disconnecting from the world too. Last summer, I went on a mission trip to North Carolina with my church. I left my iPhone at home and went seven hours west to towns that had minimal cell service. For a full seven days! It was WONDERFUL!

And I plan to do that again when I’m on my honeymoon in November – And I can’t wait!

I leave you with an article, aptly titled How To Not Be A Slave To Technology.

As for me, this weekend, I plan to disconnect again. I plan to turn off my iPhone and leave it at home, and head up to Doswell to thoroughly enjoy Kings Dominion with Al and amazing friends Katie, Brian, Mike, Justin, and Heaven. SO FUCKING STOKED!

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

07.10.15
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Commentary #8: “Quiverfull of Shit: A Guide to the Duggar’s Scary Brand of Christianity”

Disclaimer: This post contains strong language.

Image Credit: quotesabouteducation.net

Image Credit: quotesabouteducation.net

As many of you know, I follow my friend Megan’s blog, Freckled Italian, religiously. No pun intended.

I enjoy her posts immensely, and quite often, I’m inspired to write my own posts by reading hers.

Example – I was inspired by her Friday, June 26th post.

She wrote:

To Read:

Like Megan, I also don’t understand how the Duggars are so popular still!

When the Duggars first emerged on the scene, I was initially fascinated and intrigued, like many others. My parents don’t have cable TV, so I have not been a regular consumer of their show on TLC, now titled “19 Kids and Counting.” But I’m amazed that MILLIONS of people watch the show! However, with their many interviews, I have learned more than my fair share about them.

My interest peaked again when their 19th child was born prematurely. I was a preemie myself, so I felt a connection there.

But now, with the latest revelations of their oldest son’s alleged molestation, including two of his own sisters, I have absolutely zero interest in their lives anymore. I shake my head at the headlines. I’m angry. However, I wasn’t really surprised though. Molestation is often kept secret, by victims in particular, for years and years. It’s fucking terrible. I understand secrecy to an extent, but it is a terrible crime. It’s a stigma that needs to be changed. Not speaking up can cause these predators to continue their path of destroying innocence for years on end.

Personally, I was starting to get turned off by the family a few years ago, when two of the daughters entered courtship, married, almost immediately became pregnant, and declared that they wanted to have as many children as God willed them.

The courtship part was interesting to learn about, but it’s heavily supervised by the parents, and there are no individual dates. Every facet of communication is under the watch of the parents. Each single text is copied to the parents! Wow. Many children in courtship also save their first kiss for their wedding day.

… Nope, that’s not my thing!

Although I am a Christian, I don’t believe in their views of so-called Christianity. For me, I believe the couple is in complete control of adding children to their family – God is not in control in this instance. After all, the couple is having the sex to conceive, or saving the money for the adoption, or saving the money for fertility treatments, or making the decision to not have any children at all.

So, this article really intrigued me. As soon as I started reading, however, I started to feel my stomach turn. I felt so uncomfortable. I remember asking myself, just a few sentences in, “Wow, they really believe all of this?”

There are your Christians (a.k.a., me). Then there are your evangelical Christians. But the Duggars – The Duggars have gone a step further than that, which I never imagined:

“… they’re followers of a particularly scary fundamentalist sect known as the Quiverfull movement, which adheres to a deeply patriarchal and highly authoritarian set of beliefs about gender and culture.”

Wait … What?

I had no idea.

I read further, feeling my gut twist a little tighter with every word.

Birth control is evil?

Building a “pint-size fundamentalist Christian army”?

Whoa, baby. No pun intended.

That’s a little crazy.

And there’s more.

If you or your spouse happens to be infertile, and you’re part of the Quiverfull movement, well, apparently you’re shit out of luck. Apparently, God doesn’t believe in fertility treatments. So, even if you desperately want children – or God is telling you that you want X number of children, so sorry.

Also, this article doesn’t breathe a word about adoption, or foster care, or anything like that. Interesting.

“Women must obey the orders of men, in all cases”

Um, no. Hell no. Fuck no! Where are we, the 20th century, or earlier?!

I get it, in a way. Women have been submissive to their husbands – In past years. I’m sure there are some women, Candace Cameron Bure being a famous example, who prefer/enjoy being submissive.

For me, however, I believe that my future marriage is a partnership between Al and I. I try to treat Al as equally as possible, knowing that Al tries to do the same for me. When it comes to raising our future children, I would ideally like to stay home with them, if I’m able to. But, if not, I feel confident that I will be happy as a working mom as well. I will be happy as a wife to Al, and a mother to our future children, period.

“Premarital sex is sinful, and women are temptresses – who must also be sexually available to their husbands”

According to the article, this Quiverfull culture/movement, women (and men) have a lot of fucking restrictions.

I realize that there are a few denominations of Christianity that frown upon dancing, banning it even. However, with Quiverfull, women aren’t allowed to show their shoulders (Apparently that has caused their brothers in Christ to “stumble”), and then they can’t dance, AND they can’t front-hug their siblings.

What the fuck?

This makes me feel like I’m back in high school, remembering the strict dress code for school days, and then remembering the rules in place for prom and other dances. Wow!

In terms of sex, the only type allowed is “heterosexual, vaginal sex between a biological male and a biological female … and it can occur only in the bonds of holy matrimony with the intent of procreation.”

I get that, in a way. Growing up as a Christian in the United Methodist Church, I learned that sex before marriage was very much frowned upon, and if we did so, we were sinners and needed to ask God for forgiveness.

However, now, as an adult, I don’t necessarily believe that to be so bad. Sex is natural, between two people that love each other and want to express that to each other. In my opinion, as long as you’re not fucking around with multiple partners, willy-nilly, irresponsibly (i.e., without protection, you’re using your body for prostitution, etc.), I think it’s okay. As long as you love the person that you are in a committed relationship with, and you two are safe about it, I think premarital sex is okay.

“Parents control their children’s lives”

I agree with this, to an extent. As a parent, you are responsible for EVERYTHING your child does, from the day they are born until the day they turn 18. For 18 years, YOU are on the hook for your child. There are so many stories I hear from people I know, and in the media, about how the parents need to be schooled in basic parenting, or not have kids at all.

All right – Moving on …

What I don’t agree with is certain suffocating limitations in Quiverfull.

Again, no dancing. This also means no music that could cause you to dance – Meaning you’re limited to hymns and classical music. I like hymns and classical music, but if those were my only options, I think I’d prefer silence at some point. Dancing has so many benefits too – It’s exercise, it’s expression, it helps relieve stress, and so on.

Reading is restricted to “approved Christian books.” This saddens me, greatly. I love to read. I’ve learned so much about myself, about the world around me, and about my love of writing because of books. I can’t imagine not being able to go to the library as a child, to explore the wonder of getting any book I wanted, over and over. I do read some Christian books and literature, but I relish in having a choice to do so.

I do agree with controlling Internet access. That’s important, especially in today’s world of sextortion, online predators, and more. For me, my kids will not have a smartphone until the earn the money to get one, and then Mom and Dad will have strict limits on everything until their 18th birthday. My job, until they’re 18, is to protect them. I want to teach them about the bad things in this world, and then help protect my kids from it as much as possible. My kids may hate me for years on end, but my job is to be their parent, not their friend. I cannot emphasize that enough!

I don’t agree with not having a television. This is something that will be limited in my house when it comes to my kids, but it will be there. I want them to get away from the electronic devices and, you know, go outside and play. It’s how I grew up. I got kicked out of the TV room and off the computer, and sent outside. My kids will be no different.

“Families must be self-sufficient – no schools and no government assistance, no matter how many kids”

This fascinated me. Remember my recent post on welfare?

For the most part, I look at parents who choose to homeschool their children, and I think it’s amazing. I personally don’t think I could do that, ever. The best part is that we have a choice to do that. While I have a lot of beef about our education system in the U.S., I believe I got a great education in the Chesapeake public school system, and having the opportunity to be in the International Baccalaureate (IB) program in my high school was a great challenge.

However, Quiverfulls are basically mandated to live debt-free and without government assistance. Sorry – I have no idea how that’s even possible! There are so many in this country who are drowning in debt – Particularly student loan debt (It’s the fastest-growing kind, far exceeding mortgages, car loans, and credit card debt). It’s absolutely fucking terrible, it’s absurd. Many of these people will die with this debt. And that’s a damn shame!

The end of the article was also interesting, titled “The Human Toll of Quiverfull.”

This quote struck me: “It’s easy to laugh at the retrograde and irrational ideas of the Quiverfull adherents, but as Josh Duggar, Bill Gothard, and Doug Phillips have shown, the movement’s anti-feminism and authoritarianism can very easily elide, excuse, and hide abusive behavior.”

Yes, these ideas are definitely irrational. They’re hard to comprehend. After reading this article a full four times, I still have trouble wrapping my head around it all.

However, there is no excuse for abusive behavior. Zero, zilch, nada!! As a survivor of emotional, mental, and physical abuse, it makes me bristle to hear of women and men being abused, and then getting sucked back in because of broken promises. It makes me sick. But, at the same time, I’m grateful that I finally saw the light and realized I wasn’t happy, that I had lost myself, and took the steps to finally break up with John Ivey on Saturday, July 17, 2010.

I’m recently started to see a counselor to address my struggles with anxiety, recent panic attacks, and other issues that I’ve had and developed, partly because of what I endured in my four-year relationship with John. I want to overcome these issues, as much as I can, before I start a new chapter with Al when we marry on November 14th.

I want to become a better Laura Beth – A better woman, a better Christian, a better daughter, a better fiance and future wife to Al, and a better friend. I’m doing this for myself. And I feel so good!

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

06.30.15
by

Hot Topic #7: Welfare

Image Credit: Lars Larson

Image Credit: Lars Larson

“We should measure welfare’s success by how many people leave welfare, not by how many are added.” ~Ronald Reagan

That photo above?

Originally posted May 30th

At last count:

  • 70,000+ likes
  • 492,500 shares, and counting
  • Literally countless comments

I received quite an education when I found this and shared it on Facebook about two weeks ago.

It inspired me to take the comments that were posted on Facebook, and research welfare on my own.

First, the basic definition of welfare:

  • Welfare is the provision of a minimal level of well-being and social support for all citizens, sometimes referred to as public aid.

This link gives information about the U.S. welfare system.

The Heritage Foundation is another interesting resource about welfare, welfare spending, and welfare reform.

Back in 2012, The Weekly Standard published an article titled “Over 100 Million Now Receiving Federal Welfare.”

Note – This count of Americans did not include those receiving Social Security or Medicare.

In my opinion, because this chart was released by the Republican side of the Senate Budget Committee, it’s slightly biased.

However, in any case, the numbers are striking. The chart started in the first quarter of 2009, where over 97 million Americans were receiving means-tested welfare. The chart ends in the second quarter of 2011, where over 107 million Americans were receiving the same kind of welfare. Keep in mind, this chart encompasses all of 2009, all of 2010, and the first half of 2011, when the country was plunged deep into the “Great Recession.”

The article goes on to indicate that food stamps and Medicaid were the two highest programs of enrollment.

Unfortunately, I don’t think those numbers have changed for the better.

As for the picture in the beginning of this post, I was glad to get both sides of the story.

Arguing in favor of making drug testing mandatory in all 50 states when applying for welfare, it makes sense, in a way. Most employers nowadays require hired employees to complete a drug test before starting work, to comply with employees being alcohol- and drug-free in the workplace.

Applying it to welfare candidates makes sense – ALMOST.

The comments I got on this photo were how mandating drug tests could jeopardize these people greatly. I get that, I really do. If you’re applying for welfare and you’re required to get a drug test, that adds pressure. And if you’re already on drugs, that added pressure doesn’t help at all.

Another point that was made was about the money involved. Apparently those states – Florida, Kentucky, and Missouri – have LOST money because of mandating these drug tests. If a person applying for welfare passes the drug test, then the state gives them the money for the drug test, along with starting their welfare benefits.

It was fascinating to read the comments – It certainly humbled this writer!

Welfare has helped many in this country, no doubt, for many years. Food stamps keep adults and children from going completely hungry. Medicaid gives struggling parents and children the access to the healthcare facilities that they simply can’t access without assistance. And there are other programs too.

But what we always hear about is those who use and abuse the system, such as women or parents who keep having children because they know that their welfare benefits will increase with each child. That kind of thing. Apparently these women have been dubbed “Welfare Queens.”

That makes me sick.

My argument, when originally sharing this photo, was that there needed to be more regulations to the welfare system. More crackdowns. More restrictions. Because of the comments that were made, I now know that’s not the case.

These numbers should certainly be tracked and analyzed, and I think that can be improved and publicized better. Investigations should be done into suspected cases of abuse, and it should be consistent.

However, welfare is keeping many afloat.

I just wish these people could/would eventually get off welfare and make their lives even better … But that’s another story.

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

06.20.15
by

Hot Topic #6: Homelessness

Image Credit: vibewirechangemedia.com

Image Credit: vibewirechangemedia.com

We all see it, probably every single day – Someone at an intersection or some other place, aiming for high visibility from cars – People with cardboard signs, asking for help.

HOMELESS

NEED FOOD

HUNGRY

VET

NEED HELP

GOD BLESS

I’ve always been torn when I see one of these people with their signs.

When I was younger, on a trip to New York City, my parents and I were visiting the hospital where I was born. Outside the entrance, there was this black woman, a little older, thin and frail, literally begging for people to help her. It was around my birthday, in early August, so it was definitely hot and humid that day too.

As a child/early teenager (I think I was in middle school at the time), I asked my mom if we could give this poor woman, clearly suffering, money or buy her some food. I remember Mom getting a little upset, frustrated, and telling me no, that we didn’t know if she was on drugs, that kind of thing.

From then on, I couldn’t stop staring. It broke my heart.

That memory has stuck with me for all these years. As I’ve gotten older, however, I’ve learned that there are so many ways to help others who are in need.

I wanted to share with you a few ways, and tell you a few stories along the way.

First up – Blankets For The Homeless, or BFTH for short.

Image Credit: Blankets for the Homeless Hampton Roads

Image Credit: Blankets for the Homeless Hampton Roads

This is Mariah. She’s now 21 years old. And she’s making a massive difference.

Her story is amazing. She was born and abandoned on Christmas Eve. She was fostered, then adopted. She was homeless in the first hours of her life, and now she’s made it her mission to help those who are helpless and less fortunate.

BFTH is three, almost four years young now, but to the Hampton Roads area, it’s been a massive blessing since 2011.

They have a large following on Facebook – Blankets for the Homeless Hampton Roads. I love seeing the photos of donations, as well as distributions. Everyone’s smiling.

They are officially a 501c3 non-profit. Their mission: “Providing blankets, coats, hoodies, JEANS, clothes, hats, gloves, shoes, back packs, tents, tarps, toiletries, etc., & lunches to the homeless.”

Many of you who read the blog know that I follow Freckled Italian, Megan’s blog, obsessively. I love her work!

One of her posts that struck me recently was titled “On Cleaning Out My Closet.” Check it out!

Reading, and re-reading, that post from Megan, inspired me to clean out my OWN closet. I try to clean out my closet around every six months – Basically every spring/summer and then again in the fall/winter. I normally gather everything up and put it in bags and take it to the local Goodwill near my office.

However, since learning more about BFTH, cleaning out my closet this time took on a whole new meaning. When I looked at my entire wardrobe that Saturday, I immediately decided to separate it into two categories – The main one for BFTH, and the smaller one for Goodwill.

As I went through each item, I kept thinking, “If I were homeless, what would I appreciate receiving?”

I also went into my bathroom and gathered all the travel-sized toiletry items I could find. I also threw in extra, unopened, pads and tampons for the girls/women.

After the wardrobe clean-up, this was the stack of donations. I've since added to it.

After the initial wardrobe clean-up, this was the stack of donations. I’ve since added to it.

I’m very much looking forward to the day when I load up my trunk and make my way to Virginia Beach to help Mariah and her ongoing mission – Hopefully soon.

When that does happen, I’ll be sure to publish a follow-up post!

Next, I wanted to share what the state of Utah has been doing about their homeless population and housing.

Here’s one of the best summaries I could find:

In eight years, Utah has reduced homelessness by 78%, and is on track to end homelessness by 2015.

How did Utah accomplish this? Simple. Utah solved homelessness by giving people homes. In 2005, Utah figured out that the annual cost of E.R. visits and jail stays for homeless people was about $16,670 per person, compared to $11,000 to provide each homeless person with an apartment and a social worker.

So, the state began giving away apartments, with no strings attached. Each participant in Utah’s Housing First program also gets a caseworker to help them become self-sufficient, but they keep the apartment even if they fail.

The program has been so successful that other states are hoping to achieve similar results with programs modeled on Utah’s.

via Nation of Change

(Posted by Conspiracy Theory With Jesse Ventura – January 20, 2014)

Whoa. That’s powerful!

Here’s a few hot links as well:

This is inspiring. I hope Utah’s example will spread!

Another group that struggles with homelessness is our military veterans.

This is both sad and maddening at the same time.

These men and women have served our country proudly. The last thing that they should struggle with is affordable housing, on their home soil!!

“We have an epidemic of homeless veterans on our nation’s streets. Over 100,000 brave men and women just lost in the shuffle.” ~Mac Taylor, CSI: NY

TODAY.com recently featured an article on helping homeless vets with socks.

The smallest items, like socks, can easily be overlooked when people think about the homeless.

When I was going through my wardrobe, I took time to count the pairs of socks I owned. I was immediately ashamed – I lost count at 30 pairs! I vowed then and there to include clean socks in my donations, to both BFTH and Goodwill.

The best thing about BFTH is they help everyone – Men, women, children, and even pets!

Another topic that’s come up regarding the homeless is the sheer number of abandoned houses. The city of Detroit comes to mind almost immediately, with numerous stories of the amount of houses, and the city auctioning them off for $1.00 so long as the winner fixes it up, and so on.

But it’s not just Detroit. There are abandoned houses in every town, city, county in this vast country of ours. Something needs to be done.

In my opinion, everyone needs to work together to rescue these houses and turn them into something positive. It would spread positive vibes in so many ways, I think.

If people came together and worked together to clean up these houses and make them livable, a homeless person or a homeless family could have a home again. With a home, they would be able to start their life or lives over. The thought of owning a home is still a dream to so many people.

I think of Habitat for Humanity. My parents used to volunteer with the local South Hampton Roads chapter – Our family and others from church helped build several houses in the early ’90s in some of the neediest areas of Portsmouth.

When Al and I get our first house, I plan to visit the local Habitat Re-Store to see what they have to offer. All the money from the stores go back to helping people and families build their own homes!

Two weeks ago, the story of Hailey Fort, from Washington state, went viral.

This girl, all of nine-years-old, has been an activist for the homeless since she was five. She’s made it her goal to build portable shelters AND grow food for these people.

Amazing!

Another story came out in April, from Denver, Colorado – The story of The Purple Door coffee shop.

The title of this story says a lot: “Coffee shop takes girl from homelessness to happiness.”

Toward the end of May, Steve Hartman on CBS profiled a man in San Francisco, helping with his sewing machine. I love Steve’s stories. This one – It’s mending people’s clothes, impressions, and hearts.

So, you may be asking at this point, “How can I help? What can I do?”

It’s overwhelming, really.

Here are my thoughts:

  • Adopt the thought: “If I were in this situation, what would I like to receive?”
  • Donate food to your local food pantry. My church does a weekly distribution, and there are so many families that receive assistance this way.
  • Volunteer with Panera Bread’s Operation Dough-Nation program.
  • Learn more about Habitat for Humanity.
  • Educate yourself about the community/communities around you. Unfortunately, right now, homelessness is never far away.
  • As Mariah says, “We are also asking that everyone make a ‘Blessing Box’ to keep in their car with five non-perishable lunches, blankets, and as the weather gets colder, hats and gloves to be able to immediately help someone in need. You can make a difference! We all can!”
  • Any amount of money certainly helps, but sometimes, the littlest items are far better.
  • Be the change! Be proactive. If everyone gave the tiniest bit of effort and time, this world would greatly improve.

Bottom line: Get involved! No effort is too small.

Also, it’s never too early to teach your children about the powers of giving, either.

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

04.23.15
by

Book Review #7: “Save Karyn: One Shopaholic’s Journey to Debt and Back”

“To everyone who’s ever second-guessed a decision they’ve made, our past makes us who we are. Have no regrets.”
~Karyn Bosnak, 20 Times a Lady

One of my favorite places to look for books is in thrift stores.

I can’t remember when or where I bought this book, but I do remember that it sat on my bookshelf, collecting dust, begging to be read.

Toward the end of January, I picked it up for the first time in a long time, thinking it would be a good read on the plane for my recent trip to Florida.

Like “The Happiness Project,” I powered through most of this book by the end of that weekend. This book was quite a bit heftier than “The Happiness Project,” but I was very pleased with myself once I finished it.

It was really nice to be reading again!

I’ve always loved human-interest stories. I feel drawn to them. I’m fascinated by other people’s lives, especially those who have experienced tragedy, struggle, or hardship.

In several ways, I identified with Karyn.

First, there’s the settings of Chicago and New York City.

I was born in Manhattan. I have visited the city many, many times throughout my childhood because my parents took me back to the hospital where I was born prematurely, every year until I was in middle school. It has always been a special place for me. The city excites me. I love watching movies that involve NYC. I love the architecture. I love Central Park. I have had the opportunity to play at Carnegie Hall as a senior in high school in 2007, and visit The New York Times as part of my main college internship in 2010.

Personally, I would never want to live in a big city, but whenever I have an opportunity to visit, I will!

Photo montage!

Mount Sinai Hospital Image Credit: himetop.wikidot.com

Mount Sinai Hospital
Image Credit: himetop.wikidot.com

Central Park Image Credit: centralparktoursnyc.com

Central Park
Image Credit: centralparktoursnyc.com

Brooklyn Bridge Image Credit: www.trekearth.com

Brooklyn Bridge
Image Credit: http://www.trekearth.com

New York Public Library - The Stephen A. Schwarzman Building Image Credit: www.nypl.org

New York Public Library –
The Stephen A. Schwarzman Building
Image Credit: http://www.nypl.org

The New York Times Building Image Credit: www.forestcity.net

The New York Times Building
Image Credit: http://www.forestcity.net

Governors Island Image Credit: www.nydailynews.com

Governors Island
Image Credit: http://www.nydailynews.com

Carnegie Hall Image Credit: www.artsatl.com

Carnegie Hall
Image Credit: http://www.artsatl.com

Chicago is also an exciting city. I’ve been fortunate to visit there a few times, with one of my dad’s sisters having lived in one of the suburbs for almost 20 years. My heart will always default to NYC, but I look forward to the next chance that I can visit Chicago!

Second, managing money and spending beyond the means.

I’ve never considered myself to be a true “shopaholic,” but I have struggled with managing my money before. There were a few times in college where I didn’t any pay attention to my bank account – I thought I was being responsible, that I was okay.

I ended up overdrafting a couple of times over the course of a few months. That was absolutely mortifying. My parents were angry and upset, but they were more than willing to help me get back on track.

Ever since that wake-up call several years ago, I have tried really hard to get better with my money. Now, as Al’s fiance, I am preparing for our future together. I am more committed than ever to saving every penny that I can and I’ve been watching my accounts like a hawk. It feels so good to see my savings grow and grow. Every dollar counts!

I am proud to be currently debt-free, but I know that so many young adults like myself are not so lucky. Student loans, car loans, credit cards, mortgages, bills in general. I’m sure it feels like a never-ending cycle.

Seeing Karyn’s journey unfold from the pages made me laugh.

It made me cry.

It scared me straight.

As I was reading, I immediately thought back to last year, when I was winding down my 10-month stay in my apartment in Newport News. It was tough, those 10 months. Note – I never went without the essentials, I was able to pay my rent and utilities on time, but it felt like such a drain every month. I felt like I was never getting ahead. I was saving as much money as I could, but it was hard.

Moving back home was one of the hardest decisions ever, but it was one of the best decisions. I needed to experience my independence, for a little while. But I am more grateful that my parents let me come back home!

I have taken that amazing opportunity to squirrel away money like a madwoman, as much as I can, as fast as I can. It feels so good!!

In addition to saving away, I have finally started to realize just how much stuff (a.k.a., crap) I have.

A few weekends ago, I looked around my bedroom and I almost broke into tears. I felt overwhelmed. I felt greedy. I felt absolutely disgusted with myself.

I realized that at that moment, I was fortunate enough to have SEVERAL ROOMS in my parents’ house, rooms that were full of things that I called mine – Furniture, clothes, jewelry, shoes, books. It was too much. It was a tipping point.

I’ll elaborate more on that in a new post, but let’s just say it was a humbling and eye-opening experience.

In short, I took so much away from this one book. It helped me evaluate my life, where I am, and where I’m going. It was awesome!

This will be on my bookshelf forever. I plan to re-read it!!

Karyn is an inspiration. Her experiences from 1999-2002 are still relevant now, for so many.

She turned her life around, and it is so awesome to see that in those pages.

I would absolutely recommend this book.

4 1/2 out of 5 stars.

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

12.31.14
by

Quarterly Review #4

Is it really the end of the year? 2014 just FLEW BY!

This is last Quarterly Review (QR)!

14 Goals for 2014

1. Balance checkbook every month

2. Complete the 52-week savings challenge

3. Donate to Goodwill once a month

4. Find & make 14 new recipes

5. Finish 2012 novel

6. Finish 2013 novel

7. Invest in pastel painting / artwork

8. Map routes in neighborhood to walk / run / rollerblade

9. Read at least 5 new books

10. Reduce screen time

11. Take a Medical Terminology class

12. Take iron pill every day

13. Walk 20 minutes during lunch

14. Yoga

1. QR: COMPLETE! I’m so happy to have caught up with my finances!

2. QR: COMPLETE! I saved so much money this year!!!

3. QR: COMPLETE! Although I’m planning to lock myself in my bedroom this coming weekend, and not come out until the closet is clean and all the random boxes are gone 🙂

4. QR: COMPLETE! This was such a fun challenge. I plan to keep this going in the years to come 🙂

5. QR: This didn’t happen this year. But that’s okay, because next week ushers in a new series of blog posts related to this!

6. QR: See #5.

7. QR: This didn’t happen exactly the way I had hoped this year. However, I made a bunch of wreaths, and I love that!

8. QR: This didn’t happen exactly the way I had hoped, but the FitBit is still awesome!

9. QR: COMPLETE! It took me down to the very wire, but I did it!

10. QR: I’m getting better at this! Continuing to work on this in the New Year 🙂

11. QR: COMPLETE! I got a 95 on my midterm exam in October! I maintained an A average in the class, so that made me exempt from the final exam. I got an A in the class!!

Photo Credit: http://www.123rf.com/

Image Credit: http://www.123rf.com/

12. QR: This didn’t work out as planned. Still having issues with consistency. However, I’ve been able to donate blood in October and December, so I must be doing something right!

13. QR: This didn’t work out as planned, mainly because of the up-and-down weather! I’ve definitely been more creative in this department, though. Planning to take more and more steps in 2015!

14. QR: This didn’t work out as planned, but I thoroughly enjoy and look forward my meditation times in the mornings and evenings while I’m in my bed 🙂

This exercise was great for me this year. My parents were especially complimentary and shared it with many people.

With that said, I’m not going to do this again for 2015. I just want to focus on the year ahead. There are so many wonderful things, already, to look forward to:

  • Al and I celebrating our engagement
  • Al and I getting married
  • Al and I buying our first home together
  • Visits and reunions with wonderful friends
  • Traveling and having amazing adventures with great people
  • Reading more books
  • Seeing family, some for the first time in YEARS, as a result of the wedding
  • Getting at least two tattoos
  • Getting closer to receiving my Paralegal Studies degree
  • Continuing to write on this blog
  • Making progress on my three novels
  • Helping others
  • Being Laura Beth
Image Credit: moviepilot.com

Image Credit: moviepilot.com

Happy New Year to all my readers – Thank you for making this year one of the best!

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂