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Week #13: A Challenge You’ve Overcome.

Wow, where to start?

Some of you know that I was born at 25 weeks, so I had to fight for my life at the very start!

But, thinking about this post over the past week, one of the biggest challenges for me was deciding to leave my friends and school district to pursue something completely different.

When I was in eighth grade, a new magnet program had just started in one of Chesapeake’s high schools called International Baccalaureate (IB). It wasn’t new to the Hampton Roads area at the time, but it was fresh and brand-new for the City of Chesapeake and Chesapeake Public Schools.

Several of the freshmen came to my middle school to give us an overview of the program and how we could apply. After much consideration and discussion with my parents (and a good bit of prayer), I decided to apply.

I still remember how nervous I was. I even left my purse and house keys at Oscar Smith on the day of my interview and test! (Luckily, I got them back with nothing missing!)

After what seemed like waiting forever, the guidance counselor pulled me out of orchestra to tell me I had been accepted. At that moment, I felt pure joy. I was excited for something new!

However, once I started telling my friends, my joy and excitement started to erode. I was leaving them behind at Western Branch, according to them.

Going in, I knew this program was going to be challenging. I knew I was going to be taking college-level courses throughout my four years of high school. The summer assignments were enough to make me croak! I started questioning my decision, but I knew I needed to try it first.

I was the only student from the Western Branch district that first year; I was alone. Several people at church teased me incessantly – They said I was a “traitor” for leaving, especially since Oscar Smith’s football team consistently beat the snot out of Western Branch’s!

For the first six months of freshman year, I cried almost every day. I wanted to go back to Western Branch; I wanted to be with my friends again. My grades tanked! It was a struggle. Math sucked even more. Spanish was a nightmare! Even orchestra was harder!

Making friends at Oscar Smith was hard, but keeping friends at church and Western Branch was harder. I wanted to try out for the school softball team, but ended up not because I realized I couldn’t juggle IB, orchestra, and softball. It wasn’t possible.

Fortunately, once I adjusted (along with the other 49 kids in my class), it started to get better. After Christmas, my grades started to improve. My brain just needed time to adjust to the increased workload, managing the higher-level concepts, and being in a completely different environment. It got easier during sophomore year. It got harder in junior year, when we transitioned to full IB, with our assessments, Extended Essay, and preparing for our exams. We were all nervous wrecks for half of senior year as we prepared and took our exams, but we were done by the end of May. We were able to relax and enjoy the last few weeks before graduation.

The teachers were amazing, in my opinion. They were experts in their fields, but they were also willing to bend over backwards to help anyone with anything. The IB coordinators, Mrs. Ingersoll, and later Mrs. Lancaster (who’s still the coordinator today), were counselors, shoulders to cry on, and a support system. I think of Mrs. Lancaster (Biology, now the IB Coordinator), Mrs. Cofield (European and U.S. History), Mr. Degnan (English – Now one of the high school’s assistant principals), Mrs. Zwemer (Geometry, Math Studies – May she rest in peace), and Mr. Allen (20th Century History) often, to name a few.

This year marks 10 years since high school graduation. Although I clearly remember the struggles, the griping, the crying, the frustration (I still don’t fully understand the Federalist Papers, hardly anything with Algebra II, or why the Visual Arts teacher was so harsh with certain levels of interpretation), I also remember that I accomplished something – I earned my IB Diploma. I earned college credit. I went into Longwood with a much better understanding of most freshman college courses (with the exception of math – I still got a C in Honors Statistics!).

Because of IB, I was able to go on a 17-day trip to Europe (England, France, and Spain) in the summer of 2005. What an experience! Because of that trip. I decided to take a class at Longwood that took me back to France for a week in 2008, being able to further appreciate the museums of Paris and everything that the City of Lights offers.

I learned so much in four years. All because I took a chance on a new program, and I decided to stick with it, even when I thought I was going to fail everything.

Now, I’m proud to say that a current IB freshman is from my church. Many students from Western Branch have gone through the IB program in the last 10 years – Liz, Jeremy, Alyssa, Steven, Lindsey, and more.

IB was a great challenge for me, but one of the most rewarding in my entire life. I hope it’s still around when my future children are ready to go to high school!

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

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After much internal deliberation and debate, I think I’m most grateful for my compassion. I was raised that way, and I’m also grateful that it’s stuck with me all these years.

There have been several times where I was at a crossroads, and having compassion was one of the choices I could make. Although difficult sometimes, usually I’ve chosen to take the high road, and show compassion to others.

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Compassion, however, does come with a bit of a price. I was a literal doormat for years, especially when I was younger. I was so naive. I would give so much of myself, only to have a few select people walk all over me, and straight up take advantage of me.

Example: I tried to be friendly and sweet with some of the popular girls (cheerleaders, etc.) in middle school – Boy, did that backfire.

It happened with my ex-boyfriend, John – I was so compassionate towards him, that I ended up in an abusive relationship with him for the better part of four years.

It happened more recently with another former friend, J. – He saw my compassion immediately, and that turned into an ugly infatuation situation (meaning him being infatuated/obsessed/in love with me/wanting to kiss me, etc.) that I couldn’t break free of for a good long while. He blocked me on Facebook almost a year ago. It hurt a little at first, but to be completely honest, I’m far happier this way.

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I still give a lot of myself now, but I’m much more knowledgeable about people being mean-spirited and using others for their own gain.

I’ve scaled back a few friendships because of this. It was tough making that type of decision, but I’m grateful that I stuck to my guns. I’ve found that I’m far happier when I’m aiming my compassion at the people, places, and things that I truly care about!

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I leave you this Wednesday with a quote from Nelson Mandela:

“Our human compassion binds us the one to the other – not in pity or patronizingly – but as human beings who have learnt how to turn our common suffering into hope for the future.”

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #11: Someone Who Inspires You.

There are so many people that inspire me – It’s really hard to pick just one person!

When reviewing the prompt this past weekend, I thought of my mom’s mother – My Grandma Grace. Some of you have seen me mention her on the blog before. She was an amazing woman!

She lived to be 96. This year will have been her 100th birthday!

Born in 1917, in West Virginia, she lived through the Great Depression. She went to college in Ohio, which was still relatively unusual for women back then. She married my grandpa just five days before D-Day in 1944, at an Army base in Texas. Grandpa proudly served in the Army and fought in World War II.

After he got out of the Army, they moved to Florida. She worked as a social worker, and was a dutiful housewife. My grandpa was a successful businessman in Miami for many years, owning/managing furniture stores and other businesses. My Uncle Richard was born first, and then my mom came along two years later.

I was very lucky to have her in my life until I was nearly 25! She was a wonderful caregiver for Grandpa, who passed away in August 2008. I loved traveling to Coral Gables to see them several times a year – Over the years, I gained a great appreciation for Coral Gables, Coconut Grove, Miami, and the surrounding areas.

She was incredibly wise, and super smart. She loved doing the crossword puzzle in The Miami Herald every day, and she nearly finished it before the day’s end, every time. She taught me how to play to Scrabble. She also taught me that Oreos simply taste better when they’ve been frozen!

Grandma Grace inspired me to do, and taught me, many things:

• Take good care for my possessions
• Travel the world
• Learn how to cook good food
• Visit the library early and often
• Going to church is important, and also a wonderful source of socialization
• Read, read, and keep reading
• Always send thank-you notes
• Find a craft that you love (Hers was with her church group, making place mats out of greeting cards!)
• Call your family and friends frequently
• Keep up with current and world events
• Enjoy your family for as long as possible

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #10: List Five Things You Like About You

1. I love my physical features. I love that I have a good mix of my mom and my dad. Most of you know that my mom and I have the same face shape, and look very much alike, with the exception of our hairstyles. On several occasions, people have recognized me as my mom, both in person, and especially over the phone. I have my dad’s hair, skin, and eyes. I feel unique!
2. I love that I love to read and write. These two are two of my biggest passions!
3. I love that I’m no longer embarrassed about my American Girl dolls. I felt sheepish for several years; I felt un-cool talking about it. No more!
4. I love that my interest in mass media has continued after college, especially since I didn’t go into that field for my career. The state of our country is troublesome right now, but I’ve tried really hard to keep up with the current events.
5. I love that I’m left-handed! I’m a proud southpaw.

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

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Week #9: How Did You Do & Feel?

I feel really good about this challenge right now. I’m really glad I picked Wednesdays for these posts – They’re in the middle of the week, and it gives me a chance to compose my thoughts over the weekend, if need be. I’m happy with my progress so far!

Come back next week for more!

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #8: Express Gratitude to Three People.

1. To Stephanie – Thank you for being amazing! I’m so grateful that you agreed to be a bridesmaid in my wedding. You are a wonderful friend and a great pastor! Thank you for always greeting me at church with a smile and a big hug! You are loved and treasured, friend.
2. To Kristian – You are an awesome woman. From the minute I saw your blog, I knew we had a connection. Thank you for your support. Thank you for turning me on to this challenge! I’m so excited to meet up with you later this year. No excuses!
3. To Diana – I’m grateful that you’ve shared your life and world on your blog. Your faith is amazing to me. You are a pillar of strength. Thank you for being so open and honest. I’m grateful to be able to read your words. You’re a beautiful friend!

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #7: A Friend 1

The first person I thought of for this post was my best friend in this world, Melissa Beebe.

In the photo below, she’s the lovely lady with the glasses, making the bunny ears 🙂

The girls!

We’ve been friends since we were in 5th grade – Which means that we have been friends for 17 years now!

Astonishingly, the only photos of us, that I can find via Facebook, are from my bridal luncheon and my wedding day. Yikes! We need to take more photos!

Bridal luncheon, August 2015.

Gorgeous maid of honor and bride, November 2015.

I can hardly put into words how grateful I am for Melissa and her friendship for all these years. Writing this post has a lot of memories flooding back – Fighting over those silly boys at Chittum and Jolliff, voraciously reading, the fort in her backyard, chorus/orchestra trips, going to different schools for high school and college, dating, eating sushi and seeing Lindsey Stirling, calling to ask her to be my maid of honor, late-night Facebook messages, and more.

Thank you for everything, so far. Here’s to many more years!

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #6: The City You Live In

I currently live in Portsmouth, Virginia. It’s a historic city, and, as new residents, we have a lot of exploring to do!

Since Al was born in Portsmouth and raised in Chesapeake, and I’ve been in the 757 since the age of 4, we mostly know our way around.

However, we’re always up for more adventures!

I took this photo from our bedroom window after the huge snowstorm in January.

The first floor of the Children’s Museum of Virginia, in downtown Portsmouth. Al and I went on an adventure here in August of 2015. We both have fond memories of coming here as kids, but they’ve done a nice job with updating it!

I don’t have a lot of my own photos that showcase our city – Not yet, anyway.

Image Credit: City of Portsmouth

Image Credit: www.portsmouthva.gov

The Norfolk Naval Shipyard is located in Portsmouth, where it repairs and overhauls ships for the U.S. Navy. It has the ability to dry dock an aircraft carrier! Wow! It was originally named “Gosport.” There’s an amazing restaurant in the downtown district called Gosport Tavern. We went there for New Year’s Eve – Awesome food!

It was first established as a town in 1752, but its roots for shipbuilding date back to 1620! Given that we’re basically a stone’s throw away from Colonial Williamsburg (about 45 minutes), it makes sense.

There are several historic sites in our city. There’s the Olde Towne Historic District – The homes there are just gorgeous! They are always beautifully decorated for most holidays – Especially the 4th of July, and Christmas. Naval Medical Center Portsmouth has been in operation since 1827! Cedar Grove Cemetery was established in 1832.

The Commodore Theatre is another favorite – It’s a restored movie theater that looks and feels like a time capsule. They only show one movie for a limited run, with one nightly show and a matinee three days a week. You can eat lunch or dinner there, and it’s a great place to see a movie!

Portsmouth City Park is a beautiful space, and features the Pokey Smokey II locomotive. Al has taken his quadcopter there a few times, and I want to go back at least once or twice this year.

The city of Portsmouth is part of the reason that my family moved back to Hampton Roads. My dad served in the U.S. Coast Guard for 23 1/2 years. Among other active duty assignments, he served on the USCGC Bear, whose homeport is Portsmouth.

After several years and a few moves, he went into the Coast Guard Reserve, while his main full-time job was across the river in Norfolk. The Fifth District is headquartered in downtown Portsmouth, and the Coast Guard base is about five miles from our house.

I’m grateful that we found our house in Portsmouth, in a beautiful neighborhood. I’m excited to enjoy married life with Al, and eventually start our family here. We have several friends who live close by, and my parents are roughly 10 miles from us. We have almost everything close to us – The gym, grocery stores, restaurants, and a decent school district for a few years from now – and I’m very happy.

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #5: Something Someone Gave You

I don’t have a picture of it to share, but I’m grateful for the watch that I wear on my right wrist every day. It was my first Christmas gift from Al. From my recollection, there’s a tradition in his family that the first Christmas gift, when someone is newly dating, is a watch.

It’s a gorgeous piece, way more flashy and sparkly than I was expecting. It definitely shows signs of wear (half the links show copper from the finish being worn off), and I’ve had to replace the battery two or three times. But, it hasn’t broken completely in over six years, which is amazing given the number of times that I’ve accidentally dropped it!

I will continue to wear until the day that it completely dies and refuses to work anymore. To me , it’s a beautiful reminder of our first few months together, and how enduring our relationship has been.

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂

First found on Life Lessons Around The Dinner Table.

Week #4: A Family Member

You guys, it was really hard to pick just one family member! I’m grateful for every single person in my family!

But, my first instinct was to pick my Dad.

November 2015: Father-daughter dance. Dad and I danced to “Carolina In My Mind” by James Taylor. This was a surprise for my mom as well – Dad played this song when he proposed to Mom!

I wanted to share a post that I wrote in April 2014, and I published it on Dad’s birthday that year:

• Beautiful Birthdays

Although it didn’t turn into the series of posts that I had hoped, I really enjoyed writing it.

Here’s what I wrote about my Dad in that post:

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My dad’s the best. He’s been a major role model for me. Here’s 10 of the best things about him:

1. We have an awesome relationship. He’s always made me feel loved and appreciated. He’s definitely taught me hard lessons, but every minute has been worth it. The title of this blog comes from him – He started calling me “Hot Shot” forever ago. We have no idea how it started, but it’s stuck and I love it. It’s our nickname, so to speak.

2. I can call him at any time. He’s always willing to listen and offer non-emotional advice to me, even if I’m having a meltdown at 12:30 a.m.

3. Dad made me consider (stressing the word consider) the military as a career. I’m so proud to have been a Coast Guard brat.

4. Dad taught me how to do handy things – I watched him change the oil in our station wagon for the first time when I was in elementary school and that’s what started it all. I now change the oil in my Camry like clockwork, I know how to change a tire on a car and a truck, I’m decent at driving a stick, etc. And it’s not limited to just cars – I know how to change window screens, clean gutters, build a proper fire, use a chainsaw and a ton of other power tools, paint a room, and even a little bit of plumbing.

5. Dad is mission-oriented. I have seen him give so much time and effort to both local and international organizations for over 20 years. When we joined our Methodist Church in 1992, that’s one of the first things he got involved with, and he’s never left. Everything from feeding the homeless, to wrapping Christmas gifts for kids that have incarcerated parents, to blood drives, to mission trips; it never ends.

6.  Dad has an awesome talent for music. Growing up, he dabbled in the trumpet, drums, percussion. He was in the high school marching band and I’m sure he did something musical at the USCGA. Now, he’s been one of four men in the church handbell choir for the last 15 years and loves it!

7. Dad was my inspiration to start volunteering at blood drives and start giving blood. This is one of our shared passions. First, he gave blood for me when I was born at 25 weeks – That’ll be 26 years in a few months. He’s kept a folded piece of paper in his wallet that lists the date and location of every blood donations he’s given, and that’s been since the early 70s! Fast forward to the late 90s – Dad saw a need for a blood drive and thought our church could fill it. One of our church members had been diagnosed with non-Hodgkins lymphoma in 1999 and we held a joint blood / bone marrow drive for her. That was in April 2000. We went from two drives in 2000 to our clockwork drives – The second Saturday of every even-numbered month (six times per year). We’ll celebrate our 14th anniversary drive in about a week – April 12th – and we are closing in on reaching 5,000 total units collected. We average around 55-60 units per drive, so we hope to celebrate 5,000 in June or August

8. Dad’s an amazing husband to my mom. They’ve been married for 32 years!

9. Dad was my savior when it came to math (until college, anyway – I was on my own for Honors Statistics). Mom was all thumbs after I got to middle school. Plus, being an engineer by trade certainly doesn’t hurt in this department. Some of my funniest memories were when we did my homework over multiple lines of communication. Example – He had to move to Florida for a work contract when I was in 7th grade; he was gone for almost 10 months. When I brought home my Pre-Algebra work, I’d finish it to the best of my ability, scan it, and email it to him. He’d review it, and then fax it back to me at home with any corrections (or suggestions as he likes to say). One of us would call the other and we’d discuss it until everything seemed right in the math world! We repeated this process when I was in high school Geometry and he was on the West Coast for work for a couple of months. It was certainly interesting!

10. Dad was / is a great role model for keeping me active. It started in the pool. He took me water-skiing when I was 6. We rode bikes all over the neighborhood with my mom. When I started rollerblading, he and Mom would ride their bikes and when I started to slow down, he’d throw me a tow rope and he’d pull me all the way home at breakneck speed. I played rec soccer for 7 years, so there were lots of pick-up games in the backyard. I played rec softball for one season, but Dad worked with me for a couple of years before that to help condition me. We played catch in New York’s Central Park. When we flew to Florida to visit my grandparents, we packed a bat, gloves, and this crazy contraption of a softball on a fiberglass pole that tremendously improved my hitting. You get the picture. Dad also learned to ride a unicycle years ago – and we still have it in the garage.

I love you, Dad!

 I can’t remember how it happened, exactly, but my mom learned about what I wrote. She asked me to print it out. We gave it to him for his 60th birthday last year!

Mom found a really nice frame, and it hangs in the front foyer of their house.

I’m incredibly grateful to have such a close relationship with my Dad. I’ve always been a Daddy’s girl, and I always will be.

Until the next headline, Laura Beth 🙂